LEARN ABOUT THE OBSTACLES, ROLL WITH THE PUNCHES, CRUSH IT

Yesterday I wrote just about 1200 words in my personal journal.

What’s funny is that I still write in a blog worthy publication, so if the subject matter wasn’t so sensitive, I’m sure it would’ve been a killer post. I’ll probably post it sometime in the future when the sensitivity of the subject matter has dissipated.

Anyway, I decided to switch out one of my books for the month.

Tools of Titans by Tim Ferriss is too much like a reference book that it just doesn’t fit the bill for my challenge. Instead, I got an audiobook copy of Gary Vaynerchuk’s #askgaryvee, and I’m making some decent headway with it. I bought the hardcover months ago, but I’m only now starting to consume it.

I’m going to keep today’s writing short and succinct: roll with the punches.

Plans are great, and you should always make them, but when it comes to executing them, life has a way of interjecting obstacles that can veer you off track. Instead of fighting back, learn from the situation and slightly adjust your approach.

I’m definitely feeling the burden of creating something every single day. My own expectations of what I feel like I’m able to create sometimes holds me back. It’s tough to admit that, especially when my shit isn’t even that great.

A few things that I’ve learned about myself since starting this challenge:

  • When push comes to shove, I just have to start writing, and it’ll only be a matter of time before an idea strikes me that motivates me to create. I’ve alluded to this in a past post.
  • I write my best when I know what I’m talking about, which motivates me to read more, but also hinders my motivation to write. The more you learn, the more you learn that you don’t know anything.
  • Answering a question tends to be the best way for me to come up with new and novel content. My private journal can attest to that.
  • I should relish in the fact that this blog is unnoticed and obscure. This gives me the freedom to write whatever I want without any kind of pressure from an audience.
  • Action makes me more of a reason to write than inaction. Sure reading books maybe doing something, but there’s not much personal experience that you can write about with self-development books without paraphrasing the author’s words.
  • The two-week lull in motivation is very true for me. I need to understand that about myself and plan accordingly for my future challenges.
  • I use bullets a lot.
  • Some days, I just don’t feel like writing.
Well, that’s that. Writing quota for today is COMPLETED. Time to get all my other shit done.

DECEMBER 2016 – 30 Day CHALLENGE #1

I will read one book a week and publish a maximum of 500 words per day

The four books for this month are:

  1. Achieve: Find Out Who You Are, What You Really Want, And How To Make It Happen
    -by Dr. Chris Friesen, Ph.D.
  2. The Coaching Habit: Say Less, Ask More & Change the Way You Lead Forever
    -by Michael Bungay Stanier
  3. Do More Great Work: Stop the Busywork. Start the Work That Matters.
    -by Michael Bungay Stanier
  4. Tools of Titans: The Tactics, Routines, and Habits of Billionaires, Icons, and World-Class Performers
    – by Tim Ferris

Writing every day isn’t going to be difficult, but keeping it under 500 words is. Having a word count limit will push me to keep things short, simple, and crispy.

The books that I’ve chosen this month have been selected to prime my mind with the upcoming year of challenges. Full disclosure, I’ve attempted this challenge before, but I always fall off the ball somewhere within the second week.

Not this time. 

The results that I will achieve by conquering this goal are as follows:

  • I will create a morning ritual in which I start my day off with my challenge.
  • With my writing, I will be able to convey my thoughts clearly and efficiently.
  • I will focus on “documenting” as my primary source of content as opposed to trying to create/develop some new concept every single time.
  • These four books will act as my guides for using this blog to self-develop myself into someone who is capable of undertaking 12 consecutive month-long challenges.
  • Writing daily will help me to figure out what exactly those challenges are.

The point of these challenges isn’t just to complete them, it’s to conquer THE FUCK out of them and show others that it’s possible to THRIVE through the struggles.

Why?

Because there’s a marked difference between coping and thriving–and I’ve been coping with life for far too long. The goal with this challenge, and any future challenge, is to take one step towards becoming the very best version of myself, 30 days at a time.

THE STRUGGLE OF FINDING LOVE

These are my thoughts after being ferociously single for quite some time and having recently committed to a beautiful relationship.

A BETTER FIT

I used to look up to long-lasting monogamous relationships and think that they’ve got it made.

Somehow, within the periphery of that mindset, I felt like I wouldn’t be able to reach a similar level of sanctitude and happiness while being single.

True satisfaction isn’t derived from simply being in a long lasting relationship. A person who is truly satisfied has spent enough time learning about themselves and what it is that they’re looking for, then goes out to get it.

They test out different Lego pieces and then come to a conclusion when they find that specific one that fits just right.

We aren’t as clear-cut as Legos, though. 

We have the ability to transform the shapes of our personalities and lifestyles. As we develop and grow into better people, we make our shapes more and more unique.

As time goes on, we’ll constantly be refining our tastes and entering into different mindsets. We’re always picking up things along the way which worked, and removing all the things that haven’t.

Sometimes you’ve got to face the truth and realize that it’s better to simply leave that piece that just doesn’t quite fit—even if you’ve committed a lot of time to making it work—in order to start searching for something that does.

Why waste your time and energy trying to force a square peg into a circular hole?

Don’t waste years of your life looking for reasons as to why it should fit. Just ask yourself does it work? No? Then have some fucking dignity and muster up the courage to move on and look for a better fit.

A lot of people fall back on the numbers of years they’ve spent with someone as some kind of testament to how well they are, when really, the amount of time is irrelevant if the two simply don’t fit.

The difference between those who found a perfect fit early in life and those who might find it later, isn’t so much about which is better, it’s all about how well the pieces fit.

A fit found early in life will grow together and become stronger as time goes on, so long as both are willing to stay together. The same rules apply, but in this case, they’re two pieces growing together and influencing each other’s shapes.

Many internal and external forces will tug and tear at the connection between them, but those who weather the abuse, will find themselves secured tighter together. Any damages will actually make the two much harder to separate.

A fit found later in life will initially have it’s strength derived from how well these two immensely unique shapes connect.

Sure, an older more experienced piece could work with one that’s relatively new, but I think that the best fits are the ones between those with similar wear and tear. These pieces have been through countless trials with other pieces, and with every attempt at a connection, their shape slightly changes. One could only imagine the feeling of after years of looking, finding someone who just fits perfectly.

Granted, there’re so many pieces out there to sort through.

Anyone who simply finds something that fits should be considered lucky.

Most people will settle for something that works, others will be restless in their pursuits, countless others will pass on without ever finding a good fit, yet plenty will find exactly what they’re looking for.

There is no clear path to go about this process, just as there is a no way to determine which is better or worse. The experience in and of itself, regardless of what kind of connection ends up snapping together, is all about appreciating the ability to do so in the first place.

One of the most rewarding things about life is our ability to share it with another person.

Sometimes we get hung up on one piece as if they couldn’t ever be replaced, but the truth of the matter is, we live in abundance with perfect fits everywhere. It’s just a matter of clicking together and enjoying the fit for the moment, or choosing to stay held down for a bit longer.

In the end, we’re nothing but forgotten Legos out of a box.

Let’s just hope that when all is said and done, we end up being part of something much more amazing than our little individual pieces.